March Recap

We're buying a house!!! Also anniversary!

Coming in late with this one but I wanted to post a quick summary of what's been going on. I've been busy lately because...

We're buying a house!!!

Backstory

My wife Ellie and I have always been renters, and for the past 10 years it feels like we've been ping-ponging from place to place always at the wim of some landlord. I can't count the number of times we've been forced to move because the owner decided to sell the place out from under us. (Actually I can; it's happened 4 times!). We're tired of being told what we can and can't do in our own home, and we're tired of giving our money to some rich assholes who can't be bothered to actually take care of the place we call home.

I don't want to get too deep into the economics of it, but being a renter in the United States feels like being a second-class citizen. Housing prices are absolutely crazy in the US right now and they've been going up every year! Rent is going up too, so it felt like being stuck between a rock and a hard place - they're going to get our money either way. Even though I have a well-paying job, it felt like the dream would forever be out of reach for us. But the truth is I've been really fortunate in my career path, and my income has almost doubled in the past few years. This has finally put us in a position where we can actually afford to buy a house and finally (hopefully) escape the renter's treadmill!

Budget

The first hurdle was finances. I mentioned my income has shot up in the past few years, but somehow we've found a way to spend almost all of it every month. So it took me a more than 2 weeks to sort out where our money was going. Eventually I came up with a reasonable budget where we could afford the mortgage payment and still put something into savings every month. Meanwhile Ellie was looking at house listings and making spreadsheets. It seems like every day she would fall in love with a new house, and then watch in horror as someone bought it before we even had a chance to look at it. We had a few fights over finances and missed opportunities, but in the end we remembered that we were on the same team and that we're in this together. Finally, after several weeks of this, we agreed on a price point and a monthly budget.

Finding the right house

My wife and I have always liked to have our own space. I work from home and she's a student. This means we each need our own private office. Being polyamorous further complicates the need to have our own space. We ended up looking at a lot of different properties, only to have to pass on them for one reason or another. We were considering getting a pool, but just couldn't find anything that worked for us. Finally we found a place that had a ton of space and a nearly perfect room layout. The only downside is that the backyard was unfinished dirt (no pool) but there's a pad where we could (eventually) put a jacuzzi! We instantly fell in love with the place and submitted an offer the next day. 2 counter-offers later, the seller accepted! We were over the moon!

Drowning in paperwork

I had no idea there were so many steps involved in buying a house. You have to send a wire transfer, hire an inspector, pay the inspector, send a request for repairs, negotiate the request for repairs, schedule a followup inspection, read a 100 page HOA document, and sign a bunch of misc agreements. Oh and that doesn't even include applying for a home loan. There are a ton of different mortgage companies out there and even more ways they can try to screw you with hidden fees and bad deals. I shopped the lowest rates on bankrate.com and saved almost $400 a month. Even so, there's a ton of paperwork required to process a home loan and it can drag on for days or weeks to get everything sorted out. As of the time of April 13th, we're on the home stretch and we should have the loan cleared in a few days. But overall I was not prepared for the amount of bureaucracy required to buy a house. 😵

The future! 🚀

We're really looking forward to having our own house! If all goes according to plan, we get the keys in a few weeks! We're so excited! 🤩 We're already thinking about paint colors and dreaming up ideas for the back yard. We have this crazy idea that we want to make a menagerie of animal statues and a waterfall! I have no idea if we can ever afford to do that but it's still awesome having something to dream about! ^.^

Our Anniversary

In the middle of all this, we had our 3rd wedding anniversary this March. We went to a nice spa, got a massage, and relaxed in the sauna and heated pool. It was a much-needed break after the craziness of buying a house, and a great bonding experience. I can't wait for our future together!

-- Ixion ❤️ Eleonora 4 ever

Website

Buying a house has really consumed most of my free time lately. Any down time I've had was spent recovering from stress and to be honest I just haven't had the energy to work on the website. I want to get back to doing regular updates, but I think realistically the website is going to take a back seat for at least another month. I do have more ideas for the website and content I want to create, but for now I'm giving myself permission to focus on adulting. In the mean time I'll continue to post updates here and hopefully I'll be ready to give some more love to this site in the next few months.

Looking at you April

At the time of righting we're already half way into april. I'll save the events for my April recap, however I already have a good idea of what to expect this month.

• More paperwork
• Planning renovations, scheduling contractors and movers
• We get the keys at the end of the month!
• Balancing work, life, and relationships
• Maybe a bit of time to noodle on the website

Good luck current and future me! See you in 3 weeks! 😺